darker_london | Here's the truth (Merry, Geordie, Daria, Carly) [backdated August 2nd]

Merry, Geordie and Ellie were leaving for Aberdeen in the morning. Daria had a few things Merry needed. Money, mostly. Money and a car. Geordie drove Neil's van to Daria's, and waited outside while Merry went in to talk to her sister.

"You are not going to Aberdeen by yourself!" Daria exclaimed (quietly, since the babies were asleep upstairs). "That is - that is - no."

"Oh I'm sorry," hissed Merry. "I forgot that I had to run my life past you before I did anything."

"That is not-" Daria stopped herself, trying not to be drawn into a fight. "Merry, what happens if you find him? You're hunting a ghost. You can't go up against a ghost."

"Don't you tell me about ghosts," Merry narrowed her eyes in disdain at Daria. "Don't you dare."

"Oh I'm sorry," Daria echoed Merry's words, hands on her hips. "Am I wrong? Are you taking a medium with you? Or do you have some other miraculous plan? Are you suddenly an exorcism expert?"

"Daria-"

"Does Dad know?" Daria bulldozed right over Merry's words. "I am telling Dad!"

"Shut up!" Merry snapped, rolling her eyes in exasperation. "Daria, just calm the fuck down," she lowered her voice, trying to be the calm one. The one who had a plan. She probably shouldn't have sworn, but Daria shouldn't have jumped to the conclusion that Merry was a rash idiot. "Matt is coming with us. I have spoken to him and I have it all sorted. He has his motorbike. We just need a car. I'm too young to hire one. You have a car. You have have your car, and you have Con's car. May I please borrow your car."

Daria took a few deep breaths, laying her hands flat on the cool surface of the kitchen island. "Ak," she said. "I'm still very worried."

"Yeah well, I'm worried too. Joss is my friend, and I don't think he knows how out of his depth he is." Merry was on the other side of the island, leaned against it now, to take a little pressure off her knee. She sunk into the bench a little. "Daria," she said, the aggression drained out of her. "He's called me before when he needed me. When he was too sick, or too sad, or just too tired to look after himself. And I have to... I have to..." she trailed off, unsure of what, exactly, she had to do. Other than be there.

"Oh Mer," Daria said sadly. "I thought you said once that you didn't want to be his saviour." Just send Matt up there, Daria hoped silently. You don't have to go. Don't risk it.

Well someone's got to fix this, Merry thought. "There's Teagan to think about too," she added. "You know you're not going to talk me out of it."

"Argh," Daria said, turning her back on Merry, so she could get the keys for her car. Con was in Australia with Mona, so she had his car as well if she needed to take the girls anywhere. "I'm still telling Dad."

"Oh for gods sake I'm not running of to Scotland without telling Dad," Merry said. "I'm going to talk to him tonight, after I drop off the van."

Daria sighed and pushed her hair off her face (discovering a strange of hair encrusted with baby food). "Can I at least send someone else with you, like Allanah?"

"We've got Matt," Merry said. "If I do find Joss... if I show up with an army behind me... he's only going to get all defensive. I know I would. I just need to talk to him face to face."

Merry wasn't even planning to confront Joss with Matt around. He was backup only, and Merry was looking forward to telling him this. If she found Joss, she was going to have a reasonable conversation with him. She wasn't going to attack him. She wasn't going to force him. She'd get him to see how messed up this thing was, for him and for Teagan.

Logic and reason would win this.

Merry would win this.

Daria looked at her little sister and saw the determination there. "Here's the key," she said, unhooking it from her keyring. "You should probably get it copied so you have a spare. There's a spare tyre in the boot as well, and a first aid kit. You better take the emergency credit card too. And call me if anything happens. Give me a hand to move the car seats into Con's car, and then it's all yours."

Merry left Daria's with a smile on her face. She met Geordie out the front, brandishing her keyring as a token of victory. "One car, one credit card, and I didn't even piss off Daria that much," she said, pleased with herself as Geordie gave her a hug.

"So do you want me to follow you in the van to Carly's?" he asked.

"I don't think so," Merry said. "It might be a long conversation, and you've got to get home and tell Victor you're road tripping with us in the morning."

"I do have to do that," Geordie nodded. "Text me when you're home safe, though, yeah?"

"I will if you will," Merry said. "And I'll be round to get you from yours at nine."

"Oy," said Geordie. "I'll get started on the playlist tonight too." He grabbed Merry's shoulders intently. "Daria's car has an iPod adaptor, right?"

Merry laughed. "It does, don't worry." Geordie dropped her shoulders in relief. "Just make sure it's not ten hours of Spectre, okay?"

"Alright," Geordie grumbled.

Merry climbed into Daria's car and sent a text to Carly, letting her know she was on her way. She'd called Carly earlier to organise the meeting, saying that she had something really important to talk to her about. She waited till Geordie had cleared the driveway, then pulled out onto the street, rehearsing her speech the whole way there.

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Carly didn't know Merry Waterhouse. She wasn't a stranger, obviously: they went to the same school and they both were close with Joss. (Had been close, Carly corrected herself, feeling a little angry that that mental slip had gotten by.) She assumed, therefore, that whatever Merry was going to say it was about him. Maybe it was that he was a shithead - which Carly already knew, hello, but maybe it'd be nice to hear someone else say it too.

She'd just come home from work when she found Merry's message and told her that, yeah, she could come around. The little apartment she shared with the four others - the punk-folk band who were always practising at all hours - was a mess, but that was pretty usual. Her own room was neater simply because she didn't have as much stuff these days. Having to run away from home and leave most of it and not having her dad's credit cards had both put quite the dent in her possessions.

Out the front of the building Carly sat on a short brick fence, long bare limbs in her denim shorts and grey singlet - she refused to be in her Subway uniform for even a minute longer than was required and she wanted to enjoy every moment of summer. Lighting up a cigarette, Carly took a long drag and tried to spot stars through the fast moving ripples of cloud above.

Merry pulled up near Carly's front fence, and carefully locked the car. Daria's car was an old one, one she'd inherited from a dead friend, so it didn't have automatic locking or automatic windows. It ran smoothly, though, and Daria had installed an iPod adapter. It was a good car, though it smelled like babies a little bit.

Merry spotted Carly sitting on her fence, all long limbs and skin. Though it was a warm evening in the height of summer, Merry was wearing dark jeans and long sleeves. Carly smelled of cigarettes, which reminded her of Joss. "Hi Carly," she said, trying to position herself away from the trail of smoke. "Thanks for meeting with me."

Carly just shrugged and then then held her cigarette out behind her so that she could ash on the grass, overtly aware of each of her movements and always striving to make each look as uncalculated as possible. If Merry was a friend it would be different: she didn't watch herself from the outside with Jonas or Alexa. She just was. But then past a handful of people it was always important to look right and look like you weren't trying to make it look right.

"This about Joss then?" she asked the other girl, bracing one hand on the wall so she could lean.

"Yeah, it is," Merry told her, pushing her hands into her pockets. "There are some things you have a right to know." It might not have been Merry's right to tell her, but it was definitely Carly's right to know. "Do you want to talk out here?"

As though to answer Merry's question there was a crash of cymbals from inside and Carly looked back towards the house for a moment and then back to Merry. "They're about to start band practise," she told the other girl and then stood up, brushing at the backs of her thighs to clear off any dirt. "But there's a-" well, it wasn't a backyard really, but it would do. "Come on," she said, waving her up to the building.

She led Marry though the house without a word to the band setting up and from the fridge on the way she grabbed a six pack of beers. And then they were outside again, this time in a tiny cemented courtyard with three lawnchairs in various states of disrepair and a table that always rocked unevenly no matter how anyone tried to prop the feet.

"Want one?" Carly asked, pulling open the cardboard on the beers.

"God no," Merry made a face at the thought of beers. "I mean, I'm driving," she added, because she heard how rude she might have sounded. She sat down carefully on one of the chairs, testing its strength, giving it a little wobble. "So," she began, "Joss told me about why you guys broke up. He said you pretended to be Kenzie. Is that what you remember?"

Carly's expression immediately soured and she opened the beer and took a very long drink before putting it down. "Yeah, well," Carly snapped, "Joss is a dick. No surprises there."

It wasn't as though she could tell Merry that she'd been possessed by a ghost or something like that - which was, still, the only explanation for it. Ghosts. But if people who couldn't die existed, then why not people who already had?

Merry stopped herself from saying but he didn't know then, since, even after he did find out Kenzie was a ghost capable of possessing people, he was still being a jerk about it. So she said, "Yeah," instead. "Listen, I'm not trying to fuck with you. I have nothing to gain by fucking with you. So, if you can, I hope you'll believe me when I say that I think Kenzie actually possessed you. I think she's a ghost, I think she'd dangerously obsessed with Joss, and I don't think it matters who gets hurt in her way. And I'm seriously not trying to fuck with you, this is what I honestly believe."

Carly just watched her speak and it sounded ridiculous. True, but ridiculous. It was just the idea of actually hearing someone else say it outloud.

But she didn't wan to reveal herself too much yet and said, lifting her bottle again, "and what makes you believe that?" There was an obvious suspicion in her tone, a holding back.

"I've seen her possess someone else as well," Merry explained. "Joss came to me the other morning saying that Kenzie's cousin Teagan was actually Kenzie, that she'd come back from the dead and was using Teagan to - communicate - with Joss." Merry faltered a little over the word communicate. It was the worst understatement she'd ever made. Communicate. Was using Teagan to scratch her name into Joss's chest, more like. "Kenzie was possessing Teagan then. And I know it's possible because I didn't get in a car accident last year," she waved her hand at her knee which, hidden by jeans, looked normal, but maybe Carly would remember the months Merry had spent on crutches. "I told people I was because that's easier than explaining to people how you were kidnapped and injured by a ghost."

Whoa. Well this had suddenly got really heavy. Carly watched Merry for a bit and then drained her bottle, throwing it into the plastic box filled with other empties. Time to ante up.

"She possessed me," Carly said with a nod, crossing her arms. "I might be a bit of a bitch, but I'm not the kind of girl who pretends to be her boyfriend's dead ex."

Merry felt a little perk of relief. She didn't really mind if Carly had ended up thinking Merry was crazy, but it was good to be believed. "It's really fucked up," Merry said, looking at her earnestly. "It's so violating and disgusting and I felt like I should be able to control my own body but I couldn't and I am still so furious. I am so sorry it happened to you too."

"So fucked up," Carly agreed in a low voice as she leaned forward to Merry, Merry who totally got it when no one else did. "And I think it was worse how angry he was at me and that he believed I could try and hurt him like that. Stupid fucking Joss, I really l- liked him a lot, you know?" Smooth save there. She shook her head. "Ghosts are fucked up."

"They are," Merry agreed, vehemently and with fury. How strange to find the one thing Carly and merry properly had in common was this. "He's really messed up about it too. I mean, he should have fucking listened to you, and he's making some stupid fucking choices now..." Merry shook her frowning head. "I don't know if it helps but he was really upset about breaking up with you, too." As soon as she said it she regretted it. Of course it didn't help.

"Actually," Carly said, feeling a little smug and self-satisfied, "it does help." It was nice to hear that he was messed up over her. He should be messed up over her. He'd started it.

But then she sighed and recrossed her arms. "Not that it makes a difference now I guess. So," she added, trying not to sound like she was actually all that interested, "what stupid choices is he making?"

Merry was impressed to see Carly looking smug and indestructible. It might have all been a front, and she might be heading toward a breakdown after Merry left, but Merry knew that if you put up a tough front often enough, you could start believing it. Even when you were alone. It was amazing how much pretending to be stronger than you actually were could help.

She smiled grimly. "He and Teagan-Kenzie have left town together," she said. "They left a couple of days ago. I called this guy Matt, who's a medium. A proper, exorcising medium. So now Kenzie's running away to keep herself from being exorcised and Joss is running away because he's trying to protect her."

Carly watched Merry in disbelief as she unpacked it all like that and then said, "wow. That's... certainly some stuff."

And there were mediums who could exorcise ghosts like movie priests. Ghosts. Immortal People. Exorcist Priests. These things were all real things now. "Protect her?" Carly repeated. "She's a ghost and a psycho - she's not the one that needs protecting."

"I know," Merry agreed with a sharp nod. "Her death really messed with him though... I think he thinks he failed her once and he doesn't want to do it again." She remembered the time Joss had called her in the middle of the night, when he'd found himself sitting in her cemetery. And the times he'd stopped sleeping and eating, and the things he'd said about how I shouldn't have left her alone she said she hated her father I should have taken her home with me why did I leave her. "But he does NOT understand what it's like for Teagan."

Carly didn't really know what she was supposed to say in response to that. She chewed on her thumbnail and looked at the table for a bit. "Is... is there something you wanted me to do?" she finally asked, because she couldn't work out if there was a requirement for Carly right now. "Are you trying to find him? Or...uh, Teagan? Or what?"

Merry shook her head. "I only came to tell you because I didn't want you to think you were going crazy; to let you know the truth of what happened to you. You don't have to do anything. I'm going to see if I can find him, though. Me and Geordie and Ellie are going to drive up to Aberdeen tomorrow, because that's the only place I can think of that they might have gone. Unless you have any ideas?" Carly had known Joss in ways Merry hadn't, after all. Maybe she knew some secret getaway of his where he might go.

Carly shrugged a little. "We never did any 'if I ran away with my dead girlfriend this is where I'd go' if that's what you mean. And I know places he'd go in London, but outside that..." Again the shrug.

"Can I ask you something though?" Carly said, tucking her hair behind her ear.

"Yeah," Merry said, her mind on the places Joss might go in London. She wondered if she was jumping to conclusions, thinking that they'd left London. But no, Joss and told Leon he was leaving town. Teagan had told her family she was camping somewhere. April had said Teagan and Joss had taken Kenzie's old van. Merry had every reason to believe that they'd left.

"So there's ghosts and mediums," Carly said, drawing a circle on the table from her bottle's condensation. "Do you ever wonder if there's other stuff? Like... maybe there's other people who can do weird things too. I feel like maybe there is. I've seen some weird things in London." She didn't say I've been a fucking weird thing in London.

Merry nodded slowly, taking a moment to think about her answer, but not more than a moment. "Yes," she said. "Yes there are definitely other weird things in London."

Carly tried to read Merry's face but it was hard with someone she didn't know all that well. Merry always looked grumpy, Carly thought. "What things do you know?"

"I know that the nomenclature is complete crap," Merry said, undercutting the word complete with a sharp gesture of her hands. "The names that people have given these things are going to give you a completely inaccurate representation of the things themselves. I think ghosts is one of the only names that I actually agree with. Like if I say demons you're going to think of creatures from hell, aren't you?"

"Demons?" Carly repeated, visions of Supernatural dancing through her head already. "Are you serious now?" Carly didn't sound like she was disbelieving her though.

"Still serious," Merry said. "Okay, from what I know, 'demons'" she put the word in air-quotations, "are very similar to humans. There's something beyond modern science about them though, some genetic twist. They can fly, because they can sprout wings in some physics defying flap. Do you remember hearing rumours from a while ago about people seeing flying creatures in the sky?"

Carly just nodded because, yeah, she remembered that. She'd thought it had been a prank, but apparently that wasn't the case.

Cool, no blatant disbelief. Merry smiled for a brief moment. "They often have anger issues or other forms of psychosis, but not always. They can make you pass out just from being around you, but not all the time. They're kind of immortal, and they're freakishly strong."

"Immortal?" Carly asked, that part jumping out to her. "As in, they can't be killed?" The other things she was going to have process and she would but immortal related to her. If these things... was she a 'demon'? Sometimes angry but not always? Well, sometimes she was angry. Freakishly strong? Hmm, not so much, but maybe she just didn't realise it?

"They can sometimes," Merry said, watching her interest spike. It made sense that the immortality issue would be the biggest draw. It had been one of the things that freaked Merry out the most when she'd first learned about it. Immortality did not make sense; it was an impossibility in the same was as perpetual motion was an impossibility. But clearly it wasn't, which meant rearranging some pretty fundamental laws of the universe. And since no one else had managed to explain those laws, Merry had been thinking lately she should start getting into physics. "But generally, from what I've read, they last forever. It's terrifying," she added, shaking her head a little.

"Yeah," Carly said, her mind already racing ahead about it all. Demon. How to adjust to that? "Um," Carly said, standing up, "I've remembered I'm supposed to be meeting up with my brother tonight. But, uh, like, thanks for coming around? And, um, I'm sorry that you can't find him..." She was too distracted to still have Merry there all of a sudden, too twisted around by what she suddenly had learned about her own self.