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They’d paid for the night in the campsite but Teagan said there was absolutely no way she was going to sleep there tonight so Joss gave the rest of their milk to a young family then climbed into the driver’s seat and started the engine.
Teagan was wearing Joss’s jacket, as if it was a layer of protection; someone else’s borrowed armour. But the truth turned out to be that Kenzie was a better suit of armour than any leather jacket; the ghosts that had been grabbing at her and crying for attention drew back when they noticed Kenzie behind Teagan’s eyes. Kenzie snarled at them to leave her cousin alone, and to greater or lesser extents they listened, and kept their distance.
Teagan could still feel their eyes on her, though. The ones that had eyes. She pulled the jacket up around her eyes and pulled her feet up onto the seat even though it would have really upset her mum to see her riding in a vehicle in such an unsafe position.
She wanted to shout to the people in the campsite to get out, but that would mean winding down the window and she didn’t want to break the seal of protection that a closed door and window implied, even if it was only imaginary.
Joss asked her if she was alright, as they turned out of the campsite. She’d just nodded her head, which was still hidden by his jacket from the ears down.
He’s asked if she wanted to talk about once they’d turned onto the M62, pulling into a heavy stream of traffic on their way home from work. Teagan did want to talk, she did and she didn’t… but she hesitated long enough to irritate Kenzie who took over. “Some of those ghosts were very old,” Kenzie told him. “This one old bloke just looked like rot, like if you kicked him your foot would go right through him too! Fucking gross.”
“What did he want?” Joss asked. He held out his hand and Kenzie took his, linking Teagan’s fingers through Joss’s. Teagan was the one who gave him a squeeze, though.
“Iunno, probably just hadn’t seen anyone who could see him back for ages,” Kenzie shrugged.
“No, he was angry,” Teagan corrected her. “He was angry from a very long time ago. He spoke to me, but it wasn’t in English. I didn’t recognise the language at all.”
Joss’s thoughts and the traffic crawled slowly along. “How long ago, do you think?” he wondered. “I mean, they have found bog bodies in this area, haven’t they? Victims of ritualistic killings-“ Teagan winced, and Joss stopped himself from going into details. “How long do ghosts normally stick around, anyway?”
“Till they’re done,” Kenzie said. “Grace said a lot of them just hang around for their funeral rites, so they’re gone in a week. Others… others just refuse to let the world tell them what to do,” she smiled, turning up one corner of Teagan’s mouth. “Sometimes this turns them into enormous dickbags.”
“Oh, so like people,” Joss grinned wryly.
“Hah!” said Kenzie, and Teagan added, “except more likely to mess other people up.”
“People mess each other up all the time,” Joss said.
“Differently,” said Teagan.
“I guess,” he agreed.
Teagan signed, and turned in her seat to look out the back of the van. She couldn’t see anything following them, nothing but more cars. The sun was still a few hours from setting, for which she was glad. There was nothing but farmland on either side of the motorway; well, a couple of herons, but nothing sinister. She sunk back into her seat with a sigh of relief.
“Have you seen ghosts all your life?” Joss asked, after a little while.
“A little,” Teagan said thoughtfully. “Only one or two, when I was little and lived in London. Hardly any when I moved to Australia. My mum saw more than me, and talked to a few, but it wasn’t like lately.” Teagan tucked her hands into the opposite sleeves, creating a comforting arm tube. “Since I moved back to London after Kenzie died, I’ve been seeing them more and more… Grace said it might be the shock of Kenzie dying, or moving, or exposure to her and the rest of my family, or turning eighteen, or what, I don’t know… but usually if I ignored them they didn’t notice me either, you know? That’s what April and May taught me. You have to aggressively ignore them. Don’t let them know you can see them. Don’t react. Close your mind.” She took a deep breath, deep and a little shaky. “But this one came up to me, the bog guy. It was like he knew I could see him from the beginning. He came straight at me and I fell off the picnic table. He tried to grab me, and then others were following him, and they were all looking at me and some of them were yelling at me, and they all wanted something, but the bog guy was just so angry…”
“I’m sorry,” said Joss. Teagan leaned forward and rested her head against the dashboard, and he hesitated a moment, then stroked her hair. It was thin and fine and tangled, and there were leaves in it where she’d fallen off the picnic table.
“I feel a bit sick,” Teagan said, her arms around her stomach. She’d been feeling a bit sick for the last few days. A little not right in the stomach. “Where are we going next?”
“Uh,” said Joss, because he had no idea. He’d turned left onto the main road because it was easier to join the stream of traffic than try to turn across it. “Gimme a sec,” he said, pulling out his phone to bring up the map. His phone beeped a couple of times from texts, but he took Teagan’s advice, and aggressively ignored them. “This road leads to Liverpool,” he said.
Teagan nodded, forehead still on the dashboard. “That’s where Mr A’s from,” she said, after a while. “And his family.” His hunter family.
“Well, we don’t have to stay long,” Joss said. “We’ll find a place to stay and get something to eat and ten work something out. Hey, why don’t we head north? Me and Kenz can show you around Aberdeen?” He said it without thinking, though he knew that’s where Merry was. Who even knew if she’d still be there. He wasn’t planning to run into her. He wasn’t planning anything. He just… had the idea. And tracing their footsteps back up to Aberdeen… maybe it would bring new ideas. Maybe he could work out what to do from there.
Teagan sat up in her seat and turned to him, and – no, it must have been Kenzie – grinned at him. “That sounds perfect,” she said.
Teagan was wearing Joss’s jacket, as if it was a layer of protection; someone else’s borrowed armour. But the truth turned out to be that Kenzie was a better suit of armour than any leather jacket; the ghosts that had been grabbing at her and crying for attention drew back when they noticed Kenzie behind Teagan’s eyes. Kenzie snarled at them to leave her cousin alone, and to greater or lesser extents they listened, and kept their distance.
Teagan could still feel their eyes on her, though. The ones that had eyes. She pulled the jacket up around her eyes and pulled her feet up onto the seat even though it would have really upset her mum to see her riding in a vehicle in such an unsafe position.
She wanted to shout to the people in the campsite to get out, but that would mean winding down the window and she didn’t want to break the seal of protection that a closed door and window implied, even if it was only imaginary.
Joss asked her if she was alright, as they turned out of the campsite. She’d just nodded her head, which was still hidden by his jacket from the ears down.
He’s asked if she wanted to talk about once they’d turned onto the M62, pulling into a heavy stream of traffic on their way home from work. Teagan did want to talk, she did and she didn’t… but she hesitated long enough to irritate Kenzie who took over. “Some of those ghosts were very old,” Kenzie told him. “This one old bloke just looked like rot, like if you kicked him your foot would go right through him too! Fucking gross.”
“What did he want?” Joss asked. He held out his hand and Kenzie took his, linking Teagan’s fingers through Joss’s. Teagan was the one who gave him a squeeze, though.
“Iunno, probably just hadn’t seen anyone who could see him back for ages,” Kenzie shrugged.
“No, he was angry,” Teagan corrected her. “He was angry from a very long time ago. He spoke to me, but it wasn’t in English. I didn’t recognise the language at all.”
Joss’s thoughts and the traffic crawled slowly along. “How long ago, do you think?” he wondered. “I mean, they have found bog bodies in this area, haven’t they? Victims of ritualistic killings-“ Teagan winced, and Joss stopped himself from going into details. “How long do ghosts normally stick around, anyway?”
“Till they’re done,” Kenzie said. “Grace said a lot of them just hang around for their funeral rites, so they’re gone in a week. Others… others just refuse to let the world tell them what to do,” she smiled, turning up one corner of Teagan’s mouth. “Sometimes this turns them into enormous dickbags.”
“Oh, so like people,” Joss grinned wryly.
“Hah!” said Kenzie, and Teagan added, “except more likely to mess other people up.”
“People mess each other up all the time,” Joss said.
“Differently,” said Teagan.
“I guess,” he agreed.
Teagan signed, and turned in her seat to look out the back of the van. She couldn’t see anything following them, nothing but more cars. The sun was still a few hours from setting, for which she was glad. There was nothing but farmland on either side of the motorway; well, a couple of herons, but nothing sinister. She sunk back into her seat with a sigh of relief.
“Have you seen ghosts all your life?” Joss asked, after a little while.
“A little,” Teagan said thoughtfully. “Only one or two, when I was little and lived in London. Hardly any when I moved to Australia. My mum saw more than me, and talked to a few, but it wasn’t like lately.” Teagan tucked her hands into the opposite sleeves, creating a comforting arm tube. “Since I moved back to London after Kenzie died, I’ve been seeing them more and more… Grace said it might be the shock of Kenzie dying, or moving, or exposure to her and the rest of my family, or turning eighteen, or what, I don’t know… but usually if I ignored them they didn’t notice me either, you know? That’s what April and May taught me. You have to aggressively ignore them. Don’t let them know you can see them. Don’t react. Close your mind.” She took a deep breath, deep and a little shaky. “But this one came up to me, the bog guy. It was like he knew I could see him from the beginning. He came straight at me and I fell off the picnic table. He tried to grab me, and then others were following him, and they were all looking at me and some of them were yelling at me, and they all wanted something, but the bog guy was just so angry…”
“I’m sorry,” said Joss. Teagan leaned forward and rested her head against the dashboard, and he hesitated a moment, then stroked her hair. It was thin and fine and tangled, and there were leaves in it where she’d fallen off the picnic table.
“I feel a bit sick,” Teagan said, her arms around her stomach. She’d been feeling a bit sick for the last few days. A little not right in the stomach. “Where are we going next?”
“Uh,” said Joss, because he had no idea. He’d turned left onto the main road because it was easier to join the stream of traffic than try to turn across it. “Gimme a sec,” he said, pulling out his phone to bring up the map. His phone beeped a couple of times from texts, but he took Teagan’s advice, and aggressively ignored them. “This road leads to Liverpool,” he said.
Teagan nodded, forehead still on the dashboard. “That’s where Mr A’s from,” she said, after a while. “And his family.” His hunter family.
“Well, we don’t have to stay long,” Joss said. “We’ll find a place to stay and get something to eat and ten work something out. Hey, why don’t we head north? Me and Kenz can show you around Aberdeen?” He said it without thinking, though he knew that’s where Merry was. Who even knew if she’d still be there. He wasn’t planning to run into her. He wasn’t planning anything. He just… had the idea. And tracing their footsteps back up to Aberdeen… maybe it would bring new ideas. Maybe he could work out what to do from there.
Teagan sat up in her seat and turned to him, and – no, it must have been Kenzie – grinned at him. “That sounds perfect,” she said.
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