darker_london | Like a man (Samson, Thomas) (Reply)

It was something they were going to do together, yes...he and Spectre were going to talk to Samson. They were going to try to talk to him...to understand him in the hopes that they could get him to understand them. But Thomas wanted to speak with Samon by himself first. He just wanted to get a feel of the man. And he wanted to see how Samson treated him when he didn't have his hands all over the man's son.

Thomas was standing over Samson when he woke, having administered the drug to wake the man up himself. "Good morning, Samson." Thomas said, when he saw recognition in the man's eyes. He pulled a chair over to sit beside Samson's bed, and he tried to relax, though he never took his own eyes off of Samson's.

"You." Samson murmured, and his expression was not friendly.

"Me. My name is Thomas Littleton. I don't actually know if you know that..." Thomas sighed and he ran his hand through his hair.

"I don't want to know your name." Samson growled at him. "To me you are the disgusting filth corrupting my only so-"

"Don't talk to me like that." Thomas said, his voice quiet and firm. "Speak to me like a man. I want to understand your viewpoint, but I can't if all you are going to do is insult me. How can anyone expect to teach someone this way? When we have insults being spewed at us, we go into defense mode and we shut down. All we take away is hurt and anger and nothing of value." Thomas was actually impressed that Samson was still listening to him. He only hoped it was actually getting through to the man. "If you want me to learn, talk to me. I will talk to you. And hopefully we will both take something away from this."

Samson shook his head. "I can't talk to you like a man while I'm your prisoner."

"To be fair, technically you're a prisoner of the crown and you're only here because it's safer for all of us...including yourself...if you are. You're a child abuser. Do you know what they do to child abusers in prison?" Samson arched one eyebrow at Thomas and she shifted a little in the bed, looking quite uncomfortable. "But if you can possibly avoid attacking me, I'll let you up."

"I am not a violent man." Samson stated so boldy that Thomas very nearly gaped at him in disbelief. Samson Mors was one of the most violent men he knew, but he supposed that Samson meant he didn't attack people with his fists. Oh no, he used much more insidious methods to convey his messages to others. He used angelic visions to bring people pain, but even that he had vowed never to do again. There was no danger to Thomas if he let Samson up. This was one of the reasons he had wanted to come here alone at first anyway. There was no way Thomas would let Samson free while he was in the room with Spectre unless Spectre himself was the one who asked him to.

"Here." Thomas leaned over to release the far hand first, and then he released the hand closest to him. Immediately, Samson pulled himself upwards in the bed, but he made no move to escape. He knew that was fruitless. He had tried enough times to know there was no escape. "Now talk to me. I'm listening."

"You can't possibly understand the implications of your actions. You say you love my son, yet you give no thought to what you are condemning him to?!"

Thomas crossed his hands across his lap and he shook his head slowly. "I was a man of faith for many years, Samson. I can understand what you believe the implications of my actions are better than most. In fact, Peter and I are probably the people in the best positions to understand where you are coming from. And I wish there was a way for you to believe me when I say I always take Spectre's wellbeing into consideration. He is more important to me than almost anyone."

"Then how can you condemn him to Hell?!" Samson hissed, his eyes flashing.

Thomas took a deep breath to calm himself and he leaned forward a little so Samson could see he wasn't reacting to Samson's anger. He was responding in a considered manner. "Samson. It is obvious to me now that you care for and worry about your children. I'm a father, and I feel the same way about my kids."

"Your adopted children?" Samson asked, not sounding terribly kind about it.

"James is my son." Thomas corrected. "He is two and a half, and Spectre has adopted him as well so that his future is safe should anything...well...happen to me. But he is my son biologically."

"You fornicate with women too?" Samson asked, incredulous.

Thomas sighed. "His mother is no longer in the picture, but yes. I'm bisexual, though that's hardly the issue here. And our other child is in the care of his godparents and myself because I am Spectre's husband. Her parents are also out of the picture. But the fact that I am not her biological father doesn't mean I love her any less. They are both precious to me and I would do anything to keep them safe. Even from myself. And that is where I see the difference between you and I, Samson." Forcing his children to fast to the point of near-starvation, and putting them through terrifying and painful visions as well as ritual whipping...that was not protecting them from Samson's zealotry.

"Everything I did was to save them."

"I understand that." Thomas nodded. And in truth, he did, though he didn't condone it. "You fear Hell, and you did what you did to keep them from that. You taught through fear. But Samson, the world is not as you see it."

"How would you know?!" Samson growled at him. "You are nothing but a failed monk who as led my boy astray..."

"Samson, your son has been gay from the day he was born. That was not my doing. I am so grateful he is because if he wasn't, I wouldn't be married to the most incredible man I know. I have not led your son astray. I love your son. With everything I am and everything I have. I would give everything to protect him. But I do not believe in Hell anymore. I didn't fail at being a monk, Samson. I was faithful and I kept my vows until the day I died. There was no Hell. Only peace. I know you're an angel so you can understand some things in this life can't be explained. I'm dead and I'm here. If I'm brought back in the right way, I can be here for weeks at a time. And once, I even had my life back. So if you were to argue that I only avoided Hell before because I was a man of faith and my actions since my death will see me burning, I can tell you that is incorrect as well. I died a second time, and went to the very same place." Sure, it had been hellish, but that was the fault of Sacrifice and her demon honky. It had nothing to do with the Devil.

"How can I believe the word of someone so steeped in sin?" Samson asked, and for once he actually looked like he was interested in the answer.

"One day, perhaps, I can ask someone to show you. Spectre has been there. He's seen it. He knows what lies beyond this life, just as I do. I don't claim to know anything more. God, Heaven...divinity...all of that, it's still a mystery. I find myself turning back to it now after years of turning away. But what I do know, is that your children are amazing people. And they will not burn in Hell for the life they have led. Which...you should be proud of them for, by the way." Thomas' voice became quieter then. He spoke with obvious reverence. "Spectre spent so long on the street, fending for himself. He made his own way and look at him now. He's a respected musician who uses what he has to help people. He could have been...absolutely steeped in bitterness, hoarding everything he received and giving none of it away. But he has the most generous soul and so does Mara. They make the most incredible team. Your children are extraordinary, Samson. And you can't see any of that because you are so blinded by your beliefs. All you know of Spectre is that he's gay. So what? Beyond the fact that he was brave enough to be who he is even after experiencing pain because of it. The fact that he's gay has very little to do with who he is as a person. It doesn't define him. Samson...you have no idea how much I wish you knew him. Knew both of them. You would be so impressed. Your teaching methods have made both of them turn away from the church instead of towards it. Which is a travesty in my mind because faith can be so utterly powerful and neither of them want anything to do with it. But even so, your children have a lot of the virtues that Christianity promotes anyway. Even without the guidance of a religious affiliation."

"I was sent here to show people the way-" Samson sounded desperate then. Grasping at the rapidly disappearing straws of his beliefs.

"You weren't, Samson. I know many angels. I was an angel...in a way. Angels are not messengers from God. They're not here to deliver people from Hell. You're not chosen or divine or anything else. You're here just like I am. Just like anyone else is."

"I don't want to talk anymore today." Samson said, giving Thomas a tired look.

"I understand. But I do need to ask you one thing. You're serious about not using your visions ever again?"

Samson nodded firmly. "The risks are not worth it. Putting my daughter through that was sin on my part. Accidental sin is still sin. I will not risk such sin again."

"Good." Thomas leaned forward and he fixed Samson's straps up again, leaving him tied down, but lucid. "Then I see no reason to drug you again. Though mark my words, the second I hear you've used your visions again, you'll be right back in an induced coma."

Samson gave Thomas a grateful look then. He hated being kept half-awake and half-asleep. It was maddening. "Thank you."

Thomas was taken aback, but he didn't show it. He simply nodded. "You're welcome, Samson. I'll come back. Just...I hope you think about what I said."

Samson said nothing more, and Thomas didn't either. He left the room in silence and while it was probably too good to be true, he felt as if he might have gotten through. At least a little...