darker_london | Hollow Like My Soul (Flynn, Quinn, Thomas)

Jade had apologised and they had talked and visited and it was good. Flynn was afraid to let himself feel pleased about it afterwards, however, because if he let himself feel anything then sadness might creep in. And, aside from breaking down in Spectre's lap once, keeping the emotion at bay was working. If Flynn didn't feel anything, then he could be here for Quinn. He could be here for Spectre and Thomas. He could joke with Deirdre and cuddle in a chair with Autumn while she spoke with Quinn. He could pretend that 'Flynn' still existed. Because when he let himself feel, it was like the walls came tumbling down on one another until nothing was left but dust.

Ducking back inside from his cigarette break on the roof, Flynn made his way back down the hallway and to his room. Quinn was in bed, though he looked towards the door when Flynn walked through it. "Hey, Bub." Flynn whispered, knowing he wouldn't get a response back. Hating that he wouldn't get a response back. Quinn continued to watch him and Flynn walked to his side, smoothing his hair out of his eyes. "Jade's going to come to visit. She's going to bring fish for the cats and hugs for you."

Quinn watched Flynn blankly, and then he rolled his head again, towards the ever-present Booster. Booster had been keeping guard over Quinn since Quinn had come home. It did worry Flynn but then he was doing pretty much the same thing... "Do you want me to read to you? I could read Poe."

The lack of a response was not an unexpected thing. What was unexpected was Flynn's reaction to it. It was probably the ten thousandth time he'd said something to Quinn and gotten nothing back. And for some reason, it cut him to the quick. It got through and Flynn covered his mouth to keep the sudden sob that formed in his throat from escaping. "Quinn...please!" He said from behind his hand.

Quinn turned back to look at Flynn again, not because he recognised his name, but because the sound was a new sound and he was interested in it. He liked sounds.

"Say you love me." Flynn begged, even though it was completely useless. His voice was child-like and tears escaped his eyes. Flynn crawled onto the bed, and Quinn wasn't scared. He knew this person was a safe person. Not like the blond woman who poked him with things and caused him pain. This one was gentle and he spoke in a soft voice and his touches were always loving. "Please...Quinn. Come back. Quinn." Flynn reached out to touch Quinn's cheek, unable to hold his crying back anymore. "I need you to love me! I can't be alone again!" And when there was once again no response, Flynn leaned down, burying his face in Quinn's neck.

Flynn might be a safe person, but for someone that didn't understand...anything...it was quite distressing having someone making terrifying, waily sounds near your face. And Quinn started to make some distressed sounds of his own.

Thomas had been in the hallway anyway, headed to the kitchen in search of food. He stopped when he heard the clamour coming from Flynn's room, and he entered it without knocking. "Oh...oh, Flynn..." Thomas went over to the bed and he rested his hand on Flynn's back. "It's alright, Quinn!"

Quinn, who had no idea what 'it's alright' meant, and didn't recognise big, tall man, was not soothed. His noises continued.

"Flynn!" Thomas didn't know what to do! He continued to stroke Flynn's back, but Flynn was still crying. "Flynn, Quinn's afraid!"

At that, Flynn lifted his head, sniffed in an attempt to keep his tears at bay, and he reached out to touch Quinn's cheek again. "Bub, it's alright. Everything's alright. I'm sorry, Quinn! I didn't mean to be scary. Hmmm? See me? That's right. Everything's alright."

Quinn had turned to look in Flynn's eyes and slowly, his wailing died down. Flynn's fingers moved into Quinn's hair and Quinn's noises stopped immediately. He was making eye contact with the safe person, and that meant everything was okay again.

"That's my boy." Flynn kissed Quinn's cheek and he smiled at Quinn through his tears. "See, there's nothing to be afraid of. I'm here."

Thomas took a deep breath and he bit his lip. "Flynn...I...can I..do you want me to do anything for you?"

Flynn looked up at Thomas, wiping the tears from his eyes. "No, it's okay. Sometimes...I just get so upset when he doesn't talk back. I miss the things he said. We were always so happy. But...I can handle him."

"I know." Thomas nodded, and it was true. That was very obvious. "You take amazing care of him, Flynn. I meant...for you. Can I do anything for you?"

Flynn sighed and he thought about that, finally settling for, "I wouldn't know where to start. Some other time."

Thomas understood, and he nodded his head once. "Gotcha. I'm right outside if you need anything."

"I know." Flynn watched until Thomas disappeared again and he turned back to Quinn. "We'll be alright on our own, won't we? We'll always do okay on our own."

Quinn just watched quietly, fascinated.