darker_london | Guilt-cake (Merry, April) (Reply)

On the Sunday before classes started back, Merry was reorganising her room in McKinley Hall, unpacking her life back into her room. It felt like ages since she’d been here; a different woman had returned than the one who had left, and Merry wasn’t sure she liked her as much.

They’d been back in London for a week – she and Ellie and Geordie, Joss and Leon. Merry had been staying at Neil’s, and there hadn’t been a single day between coming home and leaving again than Merry hadn’t burst into tears at something totally stupid. This was not like her, not like the person she wanted to be at all.

She was more exhausted, and, Merry though, less brave.

I’ll get better, she told herself, stubbornly refusing to accept help to unpack even though her arm was in agony. I will make myself get better. The D shaped wound in her arm had been stitched up again, and she wore a sling to remind herself not to use it. At least she could still write with it, so taking notes in class shouldn’t be a problem (except for the constant distracting pain or the just as distracting painkillers) – Merry corrected herself; her arm wouldn’t be a problem, she would work through it.

Then there was the other reason she didn’t want help unpacking – she didn’t feel like she’d had a moment to herself in weeks. She wanted to build up this room of her own on her own.

(Yet she was super, super glad that Hayley was in McKinley this year too. Hayley and Ellie. She hadn’t told Hayley this, but she felt like she needed her around more than ever.)

So when someone banged on her door, Merry almost ignored it. Her door was locked, and she could easily pretend she wasn’t in. Not that I need an excuse not to answer, Merry reminded herself.

“Merry?” said a voice she recognised. “It’s April?”

Okay – Merry unlocked the door. April was one of the people she couldn’t ignore.

Teagan and Kenzie’s pink-haired cousin stood in her doorway holding a large box, which she thrust toward Merry. “I got you a cake.”

“I can’t – ” Merry nodded at her sling, and April, who never looked awkward, looked terribly awkward now.

“Shit – shit – oh god, Merry, shit – ”

Merry shook her head, but stepped back to let April into her room. April grin-grimaced at her and put the cake down on Merry’s study desk. “That’s from everyone – the whole fam, I mean. Just for – uh – getting involved.”

Merry wasn’t sure if it was guilt-cake for what Kenzie had done or gratitude-cake for getting Teagan to hospital afterwards, and didn’t particularly feel comfortable asking.

“So, guess you know ‘bout ghosts now, huh?” April grinned.

“Guess so,” Merry smile was more strained. “How do you?”

“Seeing ‘em runs in the family, a bit,” April admitted. “Did Ken do that to your arm?”

“Yep.” Merry sat down on her bed.

“Wow,” April swallowed, but her curiosity wasn’t dampened by Merry’s monosyllabic reply. “Is it broken?”

“No.”

“Oh.” April bit her lip.

“How’s Teagan?” Merry asked, which made April’s eyes widen as she blew hair off her forehead.

“She’s still in Liverpud,” April said. “Might be able to come home next week might not. Not sure. We went up to see her but, you know.”

“No?” said Merry. “Not really?” They’d left Liverpool the day after Kenzie’s exorcism, in the afternoon once Joss and Merry had been discharged from hospital (and Leon got his broken windscreen fixed). Teagan’s parents had just been arriving, and they hadn’t heard anything since.

“Oh. She’s, well… Not herself. Not talking much. Asleep heaps. And god I know it makes me trash to call her a bitch right now but shit she was though! Oh, don’t look at me like that – I love her, she’s just being mean as fuck.”

Merry sighed. Okay fine, she wouldn’t judge. “We were all wondering about Joss,” April said, chewing her sleeve.

“He’s coming back to school,” Merry said. She’d seen him once since they all came home together, the two cars driving in convoy (Matt stayed behind to ‘help Adara clean up’) all the way back to London. Joss had come over, a couple of days later, to make sure she was alright. He didn’t stay very long (and looked like he was about to fall asleep on his feet the whole time) but it had been such a relief to see him.

April’s eyebrows went up again. “Good for him.”

But Merry didn’t give any more information – Merry wasn’t the motormouth that April could be sometimes. April wanted to ask a billion things (more people who knew about ghosts!) and did try, with another “So…”

“So thanks for the cake,” Merry said, hoping to wrap this up. She had plenty to ask too – that her whole family could see ghosts was pretty fascinating – but she was also really tired, and kind of wanted her room to herself again.

“Oh! Yeah! No worries uhm, it’s for Ellie and Geordie as well – is it true Kenzie punched Geordie in the face is he okay?”

“Yeah he’s fine,” Merry said, standing up to hint to April that really, it was time to go. “I’ll see you around, we’ll talk later?”

“Oh yeah, later, sure!” April beamed, letting herself be hustled out the door. “Enjoy the cake!”