Baby where’d you go - Val, Max
Jul. 18th, 2014 08:18 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
createdwebs.insanejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
darker_londonVal felt like she was ready to rip someone's head off, and as she drove to her ex-husband's house that was evident in her slightly reckless use of the road. It had been a long time coming, but Ross had finally reached the point where his usefulness to Val financially far outweighed the mental trauma he was inflicting on their son.
She'd thought about this for an hour or so and that had been enough. She wanted Ross out of their lives, especially right now when she was trying to keep her criminal brother at bay.
She thumped on the door and when it was Ross who answered, Val was glad. She didn't want to deal with his wife right now. She didn't care about the woman one way or another - hell, she could almost feel sorry for her. Ross was sure to leave her one day and leave a mess in his wake. Again.
"We're going to talk," Val told him, storming into the house. "Right now."
"I'm a little bu-"
"You're not too busy for me," Val snapped, "I cannot believe you yelled at our son! What gave you the right to think-"
"What gave you the right to not tell me Greg was around! Goddamn it, Val! Danny's molester shows up and you don't even think to let me know about it?" He ran a hand through his hair quickly, a gesture of frustration she knew well.
"You haven't earned the right to know anything about him," Val said with a shake of her head, holding onto her anger, keeping in coiled in the closed fist at her side. "All you ever do is treat Danny like garbage and- shut up, don't even interrupt me! Don't tell me you don't mean to do that, because I'm done with caring what you mean, Ross. You're cold-hearted and selfish and the only goods things I ever got from you were those kids, and now-" A crack caught in her voice. And now Melissa is dead and Danny is in danger. She didn't want to say that.
Ross saw the change in her though and his own expression softened. "Val..." she said, reaching out to take her hand in comfort. Val shook him off and shook her head.
"You're not going to see him anymore," Val said, quiet but firm. "You won't call him, you won't talk to him. I don't care if that means I have to support him myself, because I'll find a way. I've always had to be both his parents. God knows you've never known how to be a father, despite how many times you've tried that out for size."
Ross was just staring at her in shock. "You don't tell me that Danny's in danger and then you come into my house to tell me to fuck off out of his life?"
"Yes," Val nodded. "I'll make it legal if I have to. I'll find a way."
"You can't-"
"Then maybe I'm hoping you'll do the decent fucking thing for once in your life!" Her voice turned to a shriek; it was undignified and unrestrained. It didn't make her sound in control of the situation - it made her sound desperate, just as she felt. "Please," Val said through her teeth. "Just leave us alone. Danny's suffering and every time you call I'm the one who has to hear how upset you make him. If you care about him at all, just leave him alone."
Ross was watching her but Val couldn't read his expression at all. It had been too long, and there was so much distance between the two of them now. I used to love you, was what she found herself thinking, without even looking for it. You used to be everything to me. It was almost impossible to think of them as they same people they'd been then.
"I think I'd like you to go," Ross finally said, and Val didn't know how to read beyond the surface value of that either. But she was tired and she didn't want to look at his face anymore. So she just turned and walked back out of the house and into the bright sun that blinded her for a moment before she slipped her sunglasses back on.
Val ended up sitting in her car at the front of Ross' house for a long time. She honestly had no idea what Ross would chose from here. Would he listen to her, to reason? Would he, for once, do what was best for Danny instead of what he thought was best?
Worn out by the simple confrontation, Val rested her forehead on the steering wheel and sighed. She needed to go home. She needed to continue being on guard and preparing and waiting for a thing that would - probably, hopefully - never even happen.
Knowing that Danny was still out with Dylan and his adult sister, Val took the chance to pick up a few groceries and stock up the kitchen. Besides, they'd better enjoy the high living now before Ross pulled his payments. She was packing things in the car when the first text from Danny came through to her phone, but she didn't hear it.
The second text came through before she turned the radio off, and its silent buzz wasn't enough to alert her.
It was the third text she heard, and reached across to pull the phone out of her handbag.
2 NEW MESSAGES it flashed and Val frowned, telling herself not panic before she'd looked at them. They weren't going to be anything bad. It was all okay.
Val had never in her life driven more recklessly or with more tears staining her vision. Between moments screaming at other cars on the road, she tried to explain to the policeman on the other end of the line what was going on. It was a pointless call - she was already halfway to the police station - but it made her feel like she was at least doing something.
Danny is gone, was what her treacherous, weak, cruel heart said with every too fast beat. Danny is gone, Danny is gone, Danny is gone. She could hardly breathe and she'd never hated herself more, not even when she'd let this happen the first time. She'd known the danger this time, known it exactly, and she'd gone and let some girl watch over him, thinking that would be enough.
Look at you, Valeska, her inner voice hissed. You had two children and you let Melissa die, you had two beautiful kids and Melissa is dead and Danny is gone, and tomorrow Danny will be dead as well. Tomorrow you'll have nothing left.
Danny is gone. She narrowly avoided being hit by a truck as she ran a red light.
Danny is gone. She swiped the side mirror off a parked car and the driver standing nearby shouted obscenities after her.
Danny is gone. She wiped the snot and tears from her face with the back of her arm, trying to see the road more clearly.
Danny is gone. She threw her phone onto the seat beside her.
Danny is gone. She screamed as loud as her lungs would allow and for so long that her head swam and her vision spotted.
At the police station she gave them all she could, but it was nothing more than they already had. She was useless to them. She sat in an uncomfortable plastic chair and when they told her that she needed to go home she argued, feebly, but finally acquiesced. There was nothing she could do anymore. She was in their way. She was stopping them from working. She was numb but not numb enough. Val wished she was made of rock, unmoveable and unfeeling.
She couldn't go home, not yet. She put her phone in her bra, turned up as loud as it would go. No way she could miss a call then. And, heavily, she drove to Max's house.
It was a much slower drive and Val didn't remember any of it once she was there. She just knew she couldn't go home and be alone in that house, where Danny's mattress was on the floor right next to hers. Where his clothes were piled and bunched, where his cereal bowl was probably still sitting there on the carpet even though she'd asked him to rinse it out.
She started crying again behind the wheel but this time she pulled out and stopped, letting the tears flood out of her. The sounds she made were those of a wounded animal, begging for the pain to stop. But the pain went on and on, flooding her until her head felt huge and aching and her eyes stung. Sweat and tears had stuck her hair to her face, her neck, her shoulders, her chest, and the only reason her top was not completely soaked was that being a singlet had saved it from the worst of the danger.
At Max's house she banged on the door, aware only that it was after dark. She didn't know how late it was - she'd seen the time on her phone, seen it at the police station, but she hadn't taken it in. She hadn't really managed to take anything in over the last few hours. It could have been any time between sunset and sunrise but she only hoped that Max was home. She didn't care if she woke him, she just needed him to answer.
She'd thought about this for an hour or so and that had been enough. She wanted Ross out of their lives, especially right now when she was trying to keep her criminal brother at bay.
She thumped on the door and when it was Ross who answered, Val was glad. She didn't want to deal with his wife right now. She didn't care about the woman one way or another - hell, she could almost feel sorry for her. Ross was sure to leave her one day and leave a mess in his wake. Again.
"We're going to talk," Val told him, storming into the house. "Right now."
"I'm a little bu-"
"You're not too busy for me," Val snapped, "I cannot believe you yelled at our son! What gave you the right to think-"
"What gave you the right to not tell me Greg was around! Goddamn it, Val! Danny's molester shows up and you don't even think to let me know about it?" He ran a hand through his hair quickly, a gesture of frustration she knew well.
"You haven't earned the right to know anything about him," Val said with a shake of her head, holding onto her anger, keeping in coiled in the closed fist at her side. "All you ever do is treat Danny like garbage and- shut up, don't even interrupt me! Don't tell me you don't mean to do that, because I'm done with caring what you mean, Ross. You're cold-hearted and selfish and the only goods things I ever got from you were those kids, and now-" A crack caught in her voice. And now Melissa is dead and Danny is in danger. She didn't want to say that.
Ross saw the change in her though and his own expression softened. "Val..." she said, reaching out to take her hand in comfort. Val shook him off and shook her head.
"You're not going to see him anymore," Val said, quiet but firm. "You won't call him, you won't talk to him. I don't care if that means I have to support him myself, because I'll find a way. I've always had to be both his parents. God knows you've never known how to be a father, despite how many times you've tried that out for size."
Ross was just staring at her in shock. "You don't tell me that Danny's in danger and then you come into my house to tell me to fuck off out of his life?"
"Yes," Val nodded. "I'll make it legal if I have to. I'll find a way."
"You can't-"
"Then maybe I'm hoping you'll do the decent fucking thing for once in your life!" Her voice turned to a shriek; it was undignified and unrestrained. It didn't make her sound in control of the situation - it made her sound desperate, just as she felt. "Please," Val said through her teeth. "Just leave us alone. Danny's suffering and every time you call I'm the one who has to hear how upset you make him. If you care about him at all, just leave him alone."
Ross was watching her but Val couldn't read his expression at all. It had been too long, and there was so much distance between the two of them now. I used to love you, was what she found herself thinking, without even looking for it. You used to be everything to me. It was almost impossible to think of them as they same people they'd been then.
"I think I'd like you to go," Ross finally said, and Val didn't know how to read beyond the surface value of that either. But she was tired and she didn't want to look at his face anymore. So she just turned and walked back out of the house and into the bright sun that blinded her for a moment before she slipped her sunglasses back on.
Val ended up sitting in her car at the front of Ross' house for a long time. She honestly had no idea what Ross would chose from here. Would he listen to her, to reason? Would he, for once, do what was best for Danny instead of what he thought was best?
Worn out by the simple confrontation, Val rested her forehead on the steering wheel and sighed. She needed to go home. She needed to continue being on guard and preparing and waiting for a thing that would - probably, hopefully - never even happen.
Knowing that Danny was still out with Dylan and his adult sister, Val took the chance to pick up a few groceries and stock up the kitchen. Besides, they'd better enjoy the high living now before Ross pulled his payments. She was packing things in the car when the first text from Danny came through to her phone, but she didn't hear it.
The second text came through before she turned the radio off, and its silent buzz wasn't enough to alert her.
It was the third text she heard, and reached across to pull the phone out of her handbag.
2 NEW MESSAGES it flashed and Val frowned, telling herself not panic before she'd looked at them. They weren't going to be anything bad. It was all okay.
Val had never in her life driven more recklessly or with more tears staining her vision. Between moments screaming at other cars on the road, she tried to explain to the policeman on the other end of the line what was going on. It was a pointless call - she was already halfway to the police station - but it made her feel like she was at least doing something.
Danny is gone, was what her treacherous, weak, cruel heart said with every too fast beat. Danny is gone, Danny is gone, Danny is gone. She could hardly breathe and she'd never hated herself more, not even when she'd let this happen the first time. She'd known the danger this time, known it exactly, and she'd gone and let some girl watch over him, thinking that would be enough.
Look at you, Valeska, her inner voice hissed. You had two children and you let Melissa die, you had two beautiful kids and Melissa is dead and Danny is gone, and tomorrow Danny will be dead as well. Tomorrow you'll have nothing left.
Danny is gone. She narrowly avoided being hit by a truck as she ran a red light.
Danny is gone. She swiped the side mirror off a parked car and the driver standing nearby shouted obscenities after her.
Danny is gone. She wiped the snot and tears from her face with the back of her arm, trying to see the road more clearly.
Danny is gone. She threw her phone onto the seat beside her.
Danny is gone. She screamed as loud as her lungs would allow and for so long that her head swam and her vision spotted.
At the police station she gave them all she could, but it was nothing more than they already had. She was useless to them. She sat in an uncomfortable plastic chair and when they told her that she needed to go home she argued, feebly, but finally acquiesced. There was nothing she could do anymore. She was in their way. She was stopping them from working. She was numb but not numb enough. Val wished she was made of rock, unmoveable and unfeeling.
She couldn't go home, not yet. She put her phone in her bra, turned up as loud as it would go. No way she could miss a call then. And, heavily, she drove to Max's house.
It was a much slower drive and Val didn't remember any of it once she was there. She just knew she couldn't go home and be alone in that house, where Danny's mattress was on the floor right next to hers. Where his clothes were piled and bunched, where his cereal bowl was probably still sitting there on the carpet even though she'd asked him to rinse it out.
She started crying again behind the wheel but this time she pulled out and stopped, letting the tears flood out of her. The sounds she made were those of a wounded animal, begging for the pain to stop. But the pain went on and on, flooding her until her head felt huge and aching and her eyes stung. Sweat and tears had stuck her hair to her face, her neck, her shoulders, her chest, and the only reason her top was not completely soaked was that being a singlet had saved it from the worst of the danger.
At Max's house she banged on the door, aware only that it was after dark. She didn't know how late it was - she'd seen the time on her phone, seen it at the police station, but she hadn't taken it in. She hadn't really managed to take anything in over the last few hours. It could have been any time between sunset and sunrise but she only hoped that Max was home. She didn't care if she woke him, she just needed him to answer.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}