Creeping sense of dread (Zoe, Rachel, Danny)

[lightningseed.insanejournal.com]

Rachel hadn't been at school for two days and Zoe was dreadfully worried. Yesterday she'd called Rachel's house and Rachel's stepmother said she was just sick. But she wasn't replying to texts and she hadn't been online and maybe she was sick but maybe she was kidnapped and Imogene was lying and Zoe had a huge knot in her stomach as she waited to find out which.

She'd had another bad dream last night, and she'd written down what she could remember but it wasn't much more than creeping sense of dread. This was worse than a vision, because maybe it was a premonition but maybe it was just a dream.

Basically Zoe had arrived at school that morning as an anxious mess. She had only done half her homework, and only then because she'd been using her Critical Thinking essay as a distraction. There was going to be a short test in Chemistry this afternoon too but Zoe thought she could probably wing it and get a decent mark anyway. She was good at Chemistry. And even if she fudged one small test she'd still be alright.

She and Liz had a good run of traffic on the way to school so Zoe had plenty of time to wait around before class began. She lingered in her usual spot near the front gates, where she and Rachel (and lately, Danny and sometimes even Dylan) would meet if any of them were early. There was a little flower garden protected by a short stone wall which was the perfect height for sitting and watching everyone arrive at school.

Relief crashed over her when she saw Rachel walking through the gate, and Zoe jumped up from the wall and ran over. It was obvious something wasn't right though; Rachel looked wrecked. Drained of all energy, dragging her feet. Her hair was dirty and pulled up in a ponytail and she clutched the straps of her backpack like it was a parachute.

"Rach?" Zoe asked, putting herself in Rachel's path so she had to stop and look at her. "What happened? Are you alright?"

Rachel looked up at her, without her usual smile. She breathed in deep and let it out, like she was gathering the energy to talk. "Having a bad week," she said.

"Why? Did your Dad do something? Is you family being awful?"

Rachel shook her head. No, her dad was being very helpful. He'd pulled her out of bed yesterday and guided her downstairs and put a spoon in her hand and watched as she ate breakfast. He'd put clothes in front of her and made her get dressed. He'd put her in the car and taken her to Regent's Park zoo and wasn't even mad when she refused to get out of the car because people in a crowded zoo sounded like the worst place in the world to be. He'd called school and lied and said she was ill. Today he had work, and had left her care with Imogene.

They must have arranged it because Imogene took much the same approach. Pulling her out of bed (she was stronger than she looked) and sitting her in front of breakfast. Getting her into her school uniform, putting her in a car, and driving her to school. Rachel felt like the world's must useless puppet.

"Was it finding out about what happened to Danny?"

Rachel closed her eyes and leaned forward, till her forehead rested on Zoe's shoulder. "Danny," she murmured, so sadly. Zoe wrapped her arms around her and held her, even though this caused a few members of the stream of students walking past to start calling out things like "get a room!" and "gaaay!"

"It's just everything," Rachel said, trudging the few steps back to the flower wall and sitting heavily down. "I just feel like everybody is going to die."

"Oh shit," said Zoe, who knew that feeling in her own way. She looked up as she noticed one of the people in the student stream walking deliberately toward them, but it was just Danny. "Hey Danny," she said, and shot a smile towards him.

Comments

[daniel_marlow]

With her leaning against him, Danny leaned forward and rested his head against hers for a moment. It was probably the most intimate thing he had ever done with another human being by choice. He just wanted to make her feel better and he wanted to kick the shit out of whomever made her think she had to change.

"Or me, you can call me too, but Zoe's braver," he said, smiling over at her. "Why do you feel you have to change, Rachel?"

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

Rachel had no idea where to start. "Because... everything?" she said. "Because... normal people don't need handfuls of medication? Because normal people don't cry over strangers for two days? Because normal people don't think climbing on the roof is a great idea?"

[daniel_marlow]

"I don't think normal people actually exist," he said honestly. "Most people I know are on meds for one thing or another. I think realising you might need help is strong, or at least my therapist says so every time I bring up wishing I could get by without meds. And you cried about strangers because you care so much. Why would anyone want you to change that? I think it's-it's beautiful."

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

"Shut up," she said, giving Danny a little shove with her shoulder. "I'm covered in snot."

[daniel_marlow]

That made Danny laugh and he shook his head, shoving her lightly right back. "Oh no, not snot! I'm a boy. If I saw like...a snotmonster I'd just poke it with sticks and probably giggle."

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

Rachel covered her face with her hands. "Stop it," she moaned. "You're an idiot."

"She's got you there," Zoe told Danny, with a small crooked smile.

[daniel_marlow]

"And I'll readily admit to it," he laughed, grinning over at Zoe. "An idiot boy." Now he kind of wanted to find a snotmonster to poke. "But one who thinks you're great."

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

"He's got you there, too," Zoe said, which was the closest she could get right now to telling Rachel she was great. She figured that if she'd said it, it would only come out sounding forced.

Rachel kind of wanted to pull up the collar of her uniform and completely disappear inside her clothes, but she couldn't, so she stuck out her tongue at him instead.

[daniel_marlow]

With that, Danny picked up his fork again and proceeded to eat a bit more of the treats in front of them. "What should we do for the rest of the day? Do you want to head back, or stay out, Rachel?"

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

Rachel's eyes widened as she shook her head. "No, not go back."

"We can't stay out for the whole day," Zoe said, worried again. She had a test this afternoon! Granted, she hadn't studied, but still...

"Then I'll go to the nurse and say I need to lie down. I don't know. I can't go to class. If I go to class I might cry."

[daniel_marlow]

"I'll stay out with you," Danny offered. He wasn't doing anything important and his grades could take it. "As long as it's not a regular thing. One day won't matter, right? We could go see a movie or something?"

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

"So long as it's not a sad movie," Rachel said. "Or a happy one," she added. She didn't think she could stomach that right now. "We could go see Need for Speed..." She could probably handle obnoxiously fast car races.

"We're still in uniform," Zoe pointed out.

[daniel_marlow]

"We could go change at my house," Danny suggested, not even bothered. "Since my mum's obviously not home. My uhm...there's still a few things- There's still clothes that used to belong to my sister in my room. Which probably sounds weirder than it is..."

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

"Yes," Rachel said, grabbing onto his sleeve in relief. She knew in the back of her mind that skipping class wasn't trying, and that skipping class was the start of her failure at her last school, but right now she did not or could not care. The thought of going back to school was suffocating. She looked over at Zoe, who was clearly not sure about this, with such a pleading look on her face, that Zoe smiled painfully and nodded in agreement.

[daniel_marlow]

Danny finished off the slice and then stood so he could lead the way to his house. He wasn't used to having anyone over really. It was strange and new. "It's about a fifteen minute walk, but Wolf will be really glad for some daytime company," he said with a smile.

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

Strangely, the fact that she would get to play with a dog really made Zoe feel more comfortable. She even smiled properly. Okay fuck it, she thought, falling in behind them. She would have to call Liz, though, in case something happened. What if Liz called the school for some reason, found out she wasn't there, then panicked she'd been kidnapped or something? Zoe wasn't going to do that to her.

"I'm gonna ring Liz," she told them, dialling Liz's mobile. God she was a nerdy goody two shoes, sometimes.

"Is she gonna be mad?" Rachel asked. She'd slipped her arm into Danny's, because a fifteen minute walk sounded exhausting already and she wanted someone to lean on.

"She'll be madder if I don't," Zoe said, as it started to ring.

[daniel_marlow]

Danny let Rachel lean on her, really enjoying the feeling of closeness with someone else. He didn't mind at all that she was using him for support as they walked.

Liz answered and it was clear she was worried. "Zoe? Is everything okay?"

[lightningseed.insanejournal.com]

"Yeah," said Zoe, dropping back a few more paces for a little privacy. Besides Danny and Rachel were acting kind of couple-y, and maybe she should let them have their space. "Well, sort of. Rachel's kind of upset today, so we are kind of skipping class and going to see a movie. Am I in trouble?"

[kemp-family.insanejournal.com]

Liz blinked for a moment and then she felt like her heart had grown three sizes. "Zoe, of course you're not. You're taking care of your friend. Is she okay, can I do anything?"

[lightningseed.insanejournal.com]

"Uuh," Zoe wondered if this was pushing her luck. "If you want to call school and say I'm sick... I kind of have a test this afternoon. But it's only small! And I can do a catch up in my first free period tomorrow!" Hell, this would even give her the chance to look over a couple of things tonight.

[kemp-family.insanejournal.com]

"Sure," Liz said easily enough. She knew Zoe wouldn't make a habit of this or take advantage of it. "I'll call them and text you when it's done. Call me if you need a ride, okay?"

[lightningseed.insanejournal.com]

"Liz..." you're great, she thought. You're fantastic, you're wonderful, I love you. "Thanks," she said. "I will."

[kemp-family.insanejournal.com]

"You're welcome, lovey," Liz said, her tone warm and loving. "Take care of each other."

[runrachelrun.insanejournal.com]

"I will," Zoe said again, looking at the two of them. They kind of looked like they were pretty good at taking care of each other, from here. (But then Zoe remembered the way Danny had looked at her like she knew what she was doing, like she was capable, so she figured she better continue sticking around.)

"Liz is okay with it," she said, after jogging a little to catch up. Rachel just shook her head. "Liz is amazing," she said.

[daniel_marlow]

"She really is," Danny agreed. He didn't think his mother would be quite so pleased, but he didn't plan on telling her ever.

They made their way to his house as a threesome and when he let them all in through the door, Wolf came charging in from the back garden, happily prancing up to them. Danny dropped to his knees to hug the dog in greeting. "Hello, my boy," he said happily into the dog's fur. "My room's right upstairs."